Self-Deprecating Sunday (19)

Which delights in YA authors sharing the great and awkward of being a teenager.

Today I give you myself and my sister on Easter, circa 1992-ish. Nothing in the Nineties said “Easter” like perms and white panty hose.  Oh, wait! Yes, there is one more thing: shoulder pads! I think this was the first year I went without a bonnet. Impressively, Amy found a way to work her perm under the hat. I wouldn’t have anything to do with that, thank you. But I do remember enjoying picking out blue shoes and earrings to match those crazy glasses. Smiling at all on Easter took effort.

Forgive me if I seem bitter about this holiday. You see, when I was four years old, the Easter Bunny (who is really the Boogieman) came into my bedroom and sure he left me candy, but that little bastard also took my blankie. Forever. I’ve been told I used to talk in my sleep, but I’m pretty sure I struck no bargain involving giving away blankie for a basket of chocolate. Amy didn’t have to trade anything. What was up with that? I never cared for Easter since. I think Amy felt bad for me about the whole thing. Why else would she wear those gloves? Clearly, so I could come back to this moment in time, point, and laugh. (Confession: I always did love that hat. I even borrowed it when she went off to college.)

Next week we have guest post with the adorable Mindi Scott, debut author of FREEFALL coming out in October. She has sent me her submission and I will tell you right now that it’s in the top five most self-deprecating photos! I’ve had a hard time holding back from posting it. So, that’s going to be awesome. And if you’re a YA author, and would like to do a guest post over here at Sparks and Butterflies, please contact me! Jody.mugele(at)gmail.com It’s more fun than church. (Especially Easter!)

Sea Stories

Yesterday I promised part II  of Uncle Chuck’s JAG stories and other Navy shenanigans, very appropriate for April-time tomfoolery. So, here we go!  Uncle Chuck says, “Remember, a sea story always starts:  ‘No shit, this is the truth!'”

Part II

From Chuck:

One of my collateral duties in Pensacola was to be the legal officer for the Blue Angels Flight Demonstration Team.  While I did that work, there was only one incident that I had to handle “professionally.”  One of the aircraft that flies to all Blue Angel shows is “Fat Albert”, a C-130 transport that carries spare parts, tools and the support and maintenance crews for the demonstration aircraft.  One afternoon I received a call at my office to please come out to the squadron HQ right away as there was a problem.  When I arrived, I learned that the Blues had done an air show outside the country and Fat Albert came back with too many cases of liquid adult refreshment on board to pass the Customs inspection.  I used my negotiating skills (and my contacts as the senior navy prosecutor) to smooth things over.  But there was a large alcoholic puddle in the grass near Fat Albert that afternoon.

Another tidbit relates to the TV show “JAG”.  One of my best friends in the Navy was, in part, a model for the JAG character “Harm”.  Rick was a former naval aviator, graduate of the Naval Academy and a fellow student with me at the Naval Justice School.  We both were assigned to NLSO Pensacola following Justice School so we made it a point to get to know each other.  Rick was a former A-4 pilot who had two tours on carriers in the Atlantic and had to eject from his aircraft at least two times.  He preceded me as the senior prosecutor at Pensacola so as the Senior Defense Counsel I was often was assigned to defend cases he was prosecuting.  Because we traveled two or three weeks out of five around our 3.5 state trial district, we spent a lot of time together.  On one trip, we drove together to New Orleans to try a senior enlisted marine for burglary of the enlisted mess.  He  was alleged to have conspired with another marine to do the burglary.  The other marine confessed and implicated my defendant.  However, there was no independent evidence other than the co-conspirator to corroborate the allegation that my marine was involved.  We had a Marine jury hear the case.  The jury deliberated about 15 minutes and found my Marine not guilty because there was no independent corroborating evidence.  The drive from New Orleans back to Pensacola was about 4 hours.  Rick was so pissed at the jury that he wouldn’t talk to me the whole trip.  He went on to become the Judge Advocate General of the Navy.  I didn’t.

Following my release from active duty, I moved to Indiana to practice law.  One case I had was a situation where a father kidnapped his son in Virginia after mom got a custody order and dad ended up in Indiana.  Mom hired a private detective who tracked down dad in Indiana.  She hired me to help get the son returned.  That required a hearing in Indiana.  Mom and the private detective come to Indiana, we meet for dinner to prepare for the hearing, conduct the hearing and they return to Virginia.   About two weeks later, I woke up to a TV news show with the private detective’s face on the screen with the lead news item on national tv.  The private detective was John Walker, a retired navy chief who had served on nuclear submarines, who was along with his son and brother arrested and subsequently convicted for being a Russian spy.  At the time, my friend Rick was the Director of the Naval Investigative Service (now known as NCIS–you know–another tv show).  Knowing that Rick would be fully briefed on Walker’s contacts, I immediately called him to fill him in on my innocent involvement.

Huge thank you to Uncle Chuck for sharing his adventures in the Navy! And thank you for your service to our country. I’ve really loved hearing these stories.
If you missed Part I, be sure to check it out.

Stories From Those Who Serve (5)

April is “The Month of the Military Child.” The perfect time for another interview with a soldier. Chuck Ritz and his wife, Sue, had their first daughter during Chuck’s service in the Navy. I would grow up to be good friends with her. My parents were (and still are) great friends with Chuck and Sue. Our families would vacation together. And I would occasionally wish that they were my parents, when my mom and dad grounded me from something I’m positive was completely UNFAIR! I think I was in my twenties when I realized Chuck used to be a member of JAG. If you like political intrigue novels, this two-part post is for you!  Had I known what stories Uncle Chuck was storing away, I would have asked sooner. Because he gave me so much great material, there will be two parts to this post. In this one, he answers my questions. In the next one, he shares a few specific cases he worked – the kind of stuff that if I put in a book, people would say, “that’s too unbelievable,” but really it would be true. So, come back tomorrow for that.

Part I. Here we go:

Jody: Please tell us what branch you were in and why you chose it.  Why the military.

Chuck: I was in the military because my Uncle Sam sent me a letter with an invitation I couldn’t easily refuse.  My local draft board said I had a very low number in the national draft lottery and would I please come see them to become part of the U.S. Army in 1971.  Being an astute college student when sober, I realized I needed to check on alternatives to Army green.  As I had already been accepted to law school, it only made sense to check on legal related options.  The U. S. Navy had a direct commission program for lawyers and I quickly made application.  Being somewhat naïve, I had no idea what the selection process or time would be.  I took a Navy physical in the Indy AFEES station (walked the yellow line, bent over and coughed on command with 50 strangers) and two weeks later my local draft board suggested I take their physical as well.  Walked the same yellow line, bent over etc in the same building, same docs, different strangers all within two weeks.  Then two months passed without further activity.  Then on June 29 the dreaded letter arrived—report to the AFEES station on July 7 to be inducted into the Army.  I called the Navy recruiter that same day.  He reported I had been selected into the Navy JAG program and would I please come to the recruiting station to be sworn in and to sign the appropriate papers.  Thus I became an instant Ensign in the U.S. Navy Reserve.   I served three years of my commitment on inactive duty while in law school and 4 years on active duty.

Jody: Enlisted or Officer.  Explain your job.

Chuck: I was an officer.  The progression was I was an Ensign (without ever putting on a uniform) during my first year of law school.  In May, just short of 1 year after joining the USNR, I was promoted to Lt. Junior Grade and sent to Newport, Rhode Island for two months of Officer Indoctrination School (a.k.a. knife and fork school) where they taught us how to buy and wear our uniforms and to salute.  (That took two months.  Officer Indoctrination School or OIS is much like boot camp for the MASH movie cast.  More about that later.)  Ultimately, I served as a judge advocate at the Naval Legal Service Office, Pensacola, Florida, where I served as a legal assistance officer (6 mos), the Senior Defense Counsel for Navy and Marine components in Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama  and the panhandle of Florida (1 year) and Senior Trial Counsel (Navy lingo for prosecutor) for the same region (2 years) and Court Martial Review Officer for 6 months.

Jody: When and how long were you on active duty?

Chuck: I was on active duty for two months in 1972, six months in 1973 and from 1974 to 1978.

Jody: What was the hardest part of boot camp?  The best part?

Chuck: As I mentioned in my initial reply to your request for this interview, my experience was not that of the typical recruit.  The closest thing I had to what might be “boot camp” was the two months of Officer Indoctrination School.  The purpose of OIS was to teach lawyers, doctors, dentists, pharmacists and chaplains how to act like officers and gentlemen.  It was a daunting challenge for the staff.  Physically, the OIS was located across the street from the Naval War College.  When we were appropriately attired in military uniforms (that took a couple of days for our MASH-like group), the staff directed us to go outside the building and to line up on the street (the same street adjacent to the Naval War College).  The staff commenced to try to teach us how to line up and to march.  About an hour into this exercise, the Officer in Charge of the OIS came out and spoke to staff who then dismissed us.  At the bar later we were told we marched so poorly, the Vice Admiral in charge of the Naval War College told our OIC that we would likely never learn to march and thus we went off to other training.  Our course work included naval history, naval courtesy (these were based on Ensign Bentson movies teaching us how to eat, address our seniors, how to behave in a wardroom environment and how to salute the flag and the quarterdeck when going on to a Naval vessel.)  We also attended fire fighting school, damage control school and ship handling using 100 foot Yard Patrol Boats in Buzzard Bay off Newport, RI.

Although I make light of some of the incidents, OIC did give us the fundamentals to be a serving Naval officer.  The only bad experience was on the in-door firing range where, for the first time in my life, I was staring down the wrong end of a loaded 45 caliber pistol.  A fellow student had a jam in his pistol, turned sideways (not down range), pointed the gun to the left and I was on the left.  I am sure it only took a second for the range safety officer to respond but it felt like 10 minutes.  (There was a second similar experience—more later).

Jody: Do you have any funny stories?

Chuck: There are any number of stories.  My second trip to Newport, RI for training was for Naval Justice School.  Following Naval Justice School, the Navy decided all judge advocates should experience ship-board duty for two weeks following Naval Justice School  I was assigned to training on the USS Iwo Jima, a helicopter carrier at the Norfolk Naval Station   The timing was such that my wife flew back to Indiana for a family Christmas while I sent to Norfolk.  It was a long drive from Newport to Norfolk and I arrived at the ship about 2:00 a.m.  Feeling confident about my OIS skills for checking aboard ship, I went to the quarter deck and went through the ritual without a hitch – I thought.  No one had told the Officer of the Deck that I would be arriving, so he took my service record (about 4 inches thick due to an almost infinite number of mimeographed copies of my orders) and assigned me to quarters for the night.  I went to bed and fell into a deep sleep.  My quarters were in the interior of the ship and the lights were off to sleep.  I was undressed and sleeping in my underwear.  I awoke to a pounding on my door and I stumbled to the door and the light switch.  When I finally got the door open, there was a Marine with a 45 pointed at me asking if I was an intruder.   No one at OIS had briefed us about intruders, but being a well trained judge advocate,  I promptly denied any such intruder status.  Three hours later, having gone through my 4 inch thick service record page by page several times, with the OOD, they finally told me that the CO of the Norfolk Naval Station would try to infiltrate an intruder on a ship once a month and they were convinced I was the “guy”.  Finally, at 6:00 a.m., they decided to call the ship’s XO to report about me and to ask for further direction since they could not find any indication in my service record that I was an intruder drill guy.  The XO, after getting over being awakened early, reported he had received a message the day before that I would be arriving and that I was “legitimate” and not an intruder.

One of my duties as a judge advocate in the military justice section of the NLSO was to conduct summary courts martial.   These are the lowest level of court martial and would be much like a misdemeanor court in the civilian world.  As my trial district included Mississippi, I was required to go the Pascagoula Naval Shipyard where a nuclear submarine was under repair and upgrade. To conduct a summary court martial for three sailors who robbed a pizza delivery driver.  The crew was off the ship and assigned to barracks on the shipyard.  There not being a huge work assignment for the crew during the repairs, three of the sailors (I still remember their names but they shall go nameless) decided to imbibe in too many adult beverages.  This resulted in a burning desire to provide pizza for themselves and several of their friends.  However, it being several days before the next pay, they were short on funds.  Never-the-less, they placed the delivery order, provided their names and service numbers along with the base address for deliver and proceeded to wait for the delivery.  When the driver arrived, they confessed their lack of funds, grabbed the pizzas and ran.  They forgot that they had given their names and i.d. numbers when the order was made.  In short order, the Master at Arms was having a not so friendly conversation with the trio who were still having some trouble understanding the gravity of their solution to easing their hunger pangs.   Typically, our submariners are among and brightest of sailors—however, this trio must have killed several brain cells that day.  I imposed an appropriate punishment, tried very hard to keep a straight face when the evidence was presented and the three tried to explain their motives that night.

One of my collateral duties was to be the Command Duty Officer (CDO) for the Naval Education and Training Command from time to time.  On one of the days I had that duty, the Blue Angels flight demonstration team was having their homecoming and season final air show.  In my role as the CDO, I carried communications that allowed me to monitor the radio traffic at the air show site at the Naval Air Station Pensacola.  There were approximately 100,000 visitors present to watch the air show.  As one of the preliminary events, the Marines flew in a Harrier jet.   The Harrier was relatively new at the time and folks were interested in seeing a jet aircraft that could hover, land and take off vertically and fly like a typical jet attach aircraft.  NAS Pensacola has two parallel runways with a grass median between them.  The show was in late August or early September and the grass was a bit dry.  The harrier flew in and hovered between the runways.  Almost immediately, the grass caught fire and fire trucks responded.  I heard radio traffic from the “show boss” about “move the G….D…. airplane.”  The pilot slowly moved the harrier sideways and forward to hover over a taxi way.  Well, the taxi way was asphalt.  And yes, it too caught fire.  I immediately became familiar with language on the radio from the “show boss” to the harrier about what was going to happen to that GD marine pilot as soon as he could get his hands on him.   I doubt the show boss bought him a beer at the officers club bar.

Jody: Have you experienced combat?

Chuck: No, just two close up views of the barrel of 45 caliber pistols and a bit of hand to hand combat with upset sailors and marines I was prosecuting.

Jody: How many places has/did the military send you and which has been your favorite?

Chuck: I had two periods of training at the Naval Station Newport, RI, one training period at the Naval Station Norfolk (the ship was tied to the pier the whole time—so much for “sea duty”) and the rest of the time serving at the NLSO Pensacola which included the 3.5 states it served.  Pensacola was my favorite—white sand beaches, great seafood, interesting and challenging work.

Jody: How has serving in the military changed you the most?

Chuck: Given the work I was assigned to do, I received a substantial amount of training and experience in handling trial work.  Although some of the procedures in courts martial are different than civilian courts, the principles and trial skills are very similar.  Naval Justice School provided hands on training in trial advocacy that many law schools at the time did not offer.  Over my period of active duty,  I handled approximately 600 trials of various types, including serious assaults, major drug cases and espionage cases.  This is an unusual level of experience for a young lawyer less than 5 years out of law school.

Big thanks to Chuck Ritz for providing such a great interview. Make sure you read Part II, also.

Mystery Reader

Sometimes the kids play on my computer and I end up finding photos that they took of themselves. This is one Magnolia took about two years ago. She is the sunshine in the family, so it was lovely to find it on the computer. I had a chance to read to her class this past week, and see this happiness in her, which was satisfying. I felt that happiness too.

First, a story: When Magnolia was actually close to the age she is in that photo, I was going back to school for my teaching degree. I paid little attention to how I felt about the work. I just tried to be the best at it. It wasn’t until the last class that I had what I consider the opposite of Oprah’s “Ah-ha” moment. We’ll call it the “Oh, shit” moment. The prof opened the class up for discussion on their best moments in teaching. I listened to the satisfaction around me, and paused. Then one of the ladies began crying as she talked about teaching. “I’m meant to do this!” she said through tears. People around me nodded. Um, really?  Was that what I was supposed to feel?

Huh.

So, I asked myself: what did I like about teaching? The reading and writing. That’s what I wanted to do. I took a job as an admin. assistant and wrote at night. I was much happier with the struggle to publish than I was with the struggle to inspire teens to turn in homework.

It’s been a while since I was in the classroom. Maggie’s teacher has a parent come in now and then to read. The class knows someone is coming to read and talk with them, but they don’t know who. Maggie Pie asked if I could be a mystery reader and I’d already signed up. I didn’t want to ruin the surprise, so I lied–not a hard sell, since I had to take time off work and she knows that’s unlikely.

So, when I showed up, she was pretty thrilled. I read a book (about books and reading and writing–The Library Mouse) and then had a chance to talk about the writing process.  I talked about how writing is pretty much just thinking on paper. I showed them 350 pages of paper, and how you keep having to rearrange it and cut and add new pages. We talked about an agent being like a talent scout. We talked about how you don’t give up and you just keep writing when there are no guarantees that what you write will become a book. They were engaged and interested. They had questions like, does your hand hurt from writing? How much do you get paid? (haha) What’s your book about? And Magnolia kept thanking me afterward. A boy named Ace said, “I hope your book gets made. I want to read it.”

Maybe it was pleasing Maggie by being in her classroom, maybe it was that I got to talk about one my favorite things in life, or maybe it was that a little boy WANTED to read, that made me get a little choked up. But I got that feeling I was lacking when I was teaching. I’m on the right career path now. I’m so thankful for moments like this, which buffer the loneliness, rejection, questioning and doubt, and endless waiting that accompany trying to become a YA author.

100th Post

If you’re not from Michigan, you may not know that we all talk with our hands. See how the hand is the shape of the state? That little house is where Ann Arbor is. That star is where Lansing, the Capitol, lies. I’m going to miss that part of being a Michigander. (Or, more accurately, a Michigoose.) I thought for my hundredth post I’d list 100 things I learned while living in Michigan. These won’t  be in any particular order. And may not have anything to do with Michigan except happening in the last seven years. It’s the longest Josh and I have lived in one place together. I’ve definitely learned a lot.

1. I’m afraid of bats.
2. I’m also afraid of toads.
3. Eleanor and Maggie will run in front of the lawnmower in order to save the toads lives.
4. Eleanor loves animals and she is serious about that. (as if #3 didn’t prove that.)
5. Joining SWBWI Michigan chapter is the best thing a novice writer for kids (who lives here) may do.
6. Quitting Pfizer for Med School was a good plan.
7. A Black man can be President.
8.  Josh is an incredibly hard-working medical student.
9. Orthodontia is more interesting than I could have guessed.
10. Some people’s oral hygiene – or lack thereof –  make me literally gag. I’m afraid if I ever worked on people’s teeth, I might throw up in their mouth.
11. Working on Invoicing and Payroll can be satisfying work.
12. Bosses can humiliate me.
13. Other bosses can be wonderful friends.
14. A good friend may be a curmudgeonly dentist in his sixties.
15. I’m a good young adult writer.
16. I hate wearing scrubs to work!
17. I’m a bit more of a wallower than I wish I were.
18. I do not want to be a teacher when I grow up.
19. My favorite YA book is Stargirl.
20. Signing with an agent does not mean I’ll get published.
21. But it’s a pretty damn great feeling the day he offers representation (even if you are in the most awkward position possible).
22. Sometimes even if you’re the youngest parent in the room, you’re still the most grown up.
23. I can run a 5k. In fact, I can run through Hell.
24. Turning 30 feels great.
25. My thirties are WAY better than my twenties.
26. Linkin Park is a band and not an actual park. (Thank you, substitute teaching)
27. I’m too old for Coyote Ugly. (The bar)
28. Yam fries. YUM!
29. Someday I’ll live in a city where I eat in the same restaurant nearly every day;  it should resemble The West End Grill.
30. Going to  a funeral for someone who lived a grouchy life is one of the most confusing things in life.
31. Beagles are troublemakers.
32. Facebook is fun.
33. Blogging is a lot of work, but it’s fun too.
34. Twitter is not my thing, but it’s actually pretty useful for making connections, so I’ll keep at it.
35.  According to my blog stats, most people who visit are looking for something to do with socks.
36. I understand child development milestones for babies, toddlers, and teenagers. The middle-grade years are confusing for me.
37. When you’re married, and you move a lot, you can’t have best friends like you used to.
38. But that’s okay because family fills that space.
39. I LOVE mint M & M’s so much!
40. Writers make amazing pen pals.
41. People don’t put two spaces after a period anymore.
42. Owning a home is much harder than renting.
43. Don’t sass your husband on the stairs. You may fall down and lose your zing.
44. Breaking Bad and Dexter are shows worth watching. A lot to learn about human nature here.
45. Getting rejected when applying for a job is rarely about your qualifications.
46. I should have worked when my kids were babies. I’m happier working.
47. You really don’t have to lock your front door when you live in Chelsea.
48. Michigan schools are high quality schools.
49.  I enjoy reading graphic novels, especially Blankets.
50. I’m capable of installing a chandelier in my dining room.
51. School talents shows are practically worthless.
52. I really won’t ever have my old body back, no matter how I could try (which I won’t).
53. A strange grownup feeling comes over you when your last living grandparent dies.
54. I love online Scrabble!
55. Halloween is more fun when you live in a small town.
56. It’s hard to drive in Ann Arbor (for me).
57. Using a GPS is like being omnipotent.
58. I prefer the Beach Club over Club Lulu, even though there’s no bacon on it. So confusing.
59. It takes me longer to enter a text message than to write a paragraph.
60. I’m not cut out for the military.
61. Researching boot camp is fun. Boot camp is not fun.
62. Three of the most valuable relationships you can have are with your doctor, your accountant, and your mechanic.
63. Having the sex talk with my kids was actually kind of fun.
64. Successful writing is more about perseverance than skill.
65. I’m far more sentimental than I’ll ever be wise.
66. A Moscow mule is a good drink.
67. I’m just not a fan of fantasy writing.
68. Name a song from the Eighties, and if it was in a movie, I’ll almost always be able to tell you which one.
69. These are real words: cowy, suq, adz, qat, qaid, zax, oxo, toyo, godetia, oxlips.
70. Never own a bunny for a pet.
71. If it weren’t for the Internet, I never would have completed my novel.
72. If you find buried treasure in “navigable waters,” then it’s yours to keep.
73. You should definitely visit Oaxaca, Mexico. And Huatulco.
74. If you hit shift + return, it won’t double space that next line.
75. Quark sucks. So does Power Point.
76. If your boss gives you a photo search, it doesn’t matter what you’re looking for, you will find naked people photos.
77. Our work building resides within two zip codes, so we have two different post people.
78. Every woman should read Esquire now and then.
79. One of the most amazing feelings in the world is watching your child rise above his or her fears.
80. That thing about poinsettias being poisonous to pets is an urban legend.
81. But if for some reason you need to induce vomiting with your dog, administer 1 tsp. hydrogen peroxide. Then step away from your dog.
82. A rejection letter can be thrilling. But it is usually heart-breaking.
83. One quarter of all pregnancies don’t result in a living baby.
84. When your computer gets struck by lightening, your insurance may cover it under the “Acts Of God” clause.
85. There are worse things in the world than a bad economy.
86. Men usually DO build a better sandwich.
87. All my favorite authors are men. Weird.
88. I’m more apt to buy a book if it has a pink cover.
89. If you add up all the pages of all the Harry Potter book, you get 2332 pages. (That’s a little over 4 and 1/2 reams of paper)
90. The word with the most consonants and least vowels is strength.
91. If you need to have an important conversation with your kids, go on a long drive. They can’t leave the car and will generally stay engaged.
92. Always give someone a good reference. Everyone needs a job.
93. It really bothers me to hear other people make fun of, or badmouth, fat people. It REALLY bothers me.
94. You never know who will take your advice.
95. I have bad taste in music.
96. My neighbors are not my people, but I still love living in a small town.
97. I need to travel more.
98. Sometimes it’s important to ask your kids what they think about your parenting.
99. If Goonies is on, I can’t turn away.
100. Some of the most meaningful relationships you have, may ones that are online.

Guest Blogger: Josh Mugele (The husband), on Books

Jody asked me to write a post as a guest blogger for her blog this morning because she’s feeling down having to think about the prospect of moving and looking for a new job but still likes seeing people visit her blog.  Apparently the uptick on her traffic meter makes her happy.

I asked her what I should write about.  She said anything I wanted.  I asked if I could write about my butt.  She said no.

So, I thought I would write about books.  There’s a little internet meme going around right now where all the cool bloggers are writing about the 10 books that influenced them the most.  I thought about what my list would be like and immediately had a few problems with the concept.  First, I often like a lot of books by the same author.  I can’t really separate them out.  Second, I don’t know that I could stratify them into any sort of rank order.  So, instead I’ll write about authors I really, really like and who I can read over and over again.  The list will probably be in the ballpark of 10.

A few words before I get started:  you may notice that most (if not all) of the authors I like are dead.  I don’t know if that’s a comment on my background (lit major in college) or my indictment on how I feel about current literature or what, but there it is.  Also, as I was thinking about this list I noticed that many of my choices were what you might call novels of ideas.  Not all, but a lot.  It’s not that I don’t appreciate good story-telling or a well-developed character, but these are the kinds of books I’m drawn to.

So, here we go:

  • Jorge Louis Borges Author of mostly short stories and essays, his Ficciones is one of the most intriguing books I’ve ever read.  The story, “The Library of Babel” should be required reading.

  • Albert Camus I think he’s a little unfairly known as an existentialist philosopher and linked with Sartre.  At the end of the day, he just wrote some damn good novels.  The Stranger is probably his most recognized, but my favorite is The Plague about a town quarantined by the bubonic plague and the struggles between the doctor and the priest.

My favorite quote from the book:  “Yet after all—since the order of the world is shaped by death, mightn’t it be better for God if we refuse to believe in Him and struggle with all our might against death, without raising our eyes toward the Heavens where He sits in silence?”

  • John Gardner Usually required high school reading for his novel Grendel, Gardner also wrote The Sunlight Dialogues and a lesser-known but well-loved (by me) The Wreckage of Agathon.  He was a creative writing teacher who also wrote a book called The Art of Fiction where he argued that art has to have some sort of moral element.  While, I might argue with him on some of his theories, I love his novels.  He was, above all, an ambitious writer.

  • Fyodor Dostoyevsky The Idiot and The Brothers Karamazov were my favorites.  But when I was in college, I probably read every book he wrote.    They’re a little daunting at over 500 pages each, but written with passion.

  • Raymond Chandler The father of detective fiction, he’s responsible for creating the penultimate detective, Philip Marlowe, in works like The Long Goodbye and The Big Sleep.  I like his books because of the lonely morality of his protagonist but mostly because the prose is so incredibly fun to read.  For example:
    • Chess is the most elaborate waste of human intelligence outside of an advertising agency. 
    • Alcohol is like love. The first kiss is magic, the second is intimate, the third is routine. After that you take the girl’s clothes off.
    • I guess God made Boston on a wet Sunday.
    • I think a man ought to get drunk at least twice a year just on principle, so he won’t let himself get snotty about it.
    • From 30 feet away she looked like a lot of class. From 10 feet away she looked like something made up to be seen from 30 feet away.

  • Robert Fagles This one cheats a little bit.  He’s a translator of Homer’s works.  But here’s the reason I love him, the opening stanza from his translation of The Iliad: 

Rage – Goddess, sing the rage of Peleus’ son Achilles,

Murderous, doomed, that cost the Achaeans countless losses,

Hurling down to the House of Death so many sturdy souls,

Great fighters’ souls, but made their bodies carrion,

Feasts for the dogs and birds,

And the will of Zeus was moving toward its end.

Begin, Muse, when the two first broke and clashed,

Agamemnon lord of men and brilliant Achilles.

  • Graham Greene Probably the greatest modern writer never to get the Nobel Prize.  I recommend The Third Man and The Power and the Glory.

  • Kurt Vonnegut When he’s on he’s on, but when he’s not, meh.  I loved Cat’s Cradle and God Bless You Mr. Rosewater.

  • Gabriel Garcia Marquez His longer novels can be a bit of a drag sometimes, but his short pieces are close to perfection.  Chronicle of a Death Foretold and Of Love and Other Demons are wonderful.  And I really like the rhythm of Spanish when it’s translated into English.  Makes me feel exotic or something.

  • Robert Graves He is the classics scholar turned novelist (and poet).  I, Claudius and Claudius the God are two of the best novels ever written.  His post WWI-era autobiography, Goodbye to All of That is supposed to be phenomenal.  It’s on my list to read.

  • T.H. White The Once and Future King is all I’m aware he’s ever written.  I guess it could be described as a children’s novel – basically the re-writing of the Arthur legend.  But it’s so bittersweet, funny, and moving.  I’ll love this book forever.

  • Milan Kundera I’ve read most of his books by the Czech novelist, but the one I liked the best was his most famous, The Unbearable Lightness of Being.  Like Borges, he really struggles with the idea of infinite and where humans fit into it.

Matched and Still Married

Being matched is a good feeling.

I don’t talk about my marriage much on my blog, but I think today I will. I’m not a believer in destiny or “the one I am meant to be with.” I just knew Josh was interesting and I wanted to be around him forever. This is how he proposed: we were driving from my home in Indiana back to college in Tennessee. Josh stopped at the Cumberland Gap. It’s a gorgeous ravine, especially in the Fall. We sat down on the stony ledge, and he took out my grandmother’s ring. He said, “If you don’t marry me, I’ll throw myself off the ledge.” What’s a girl to do?

It’s probably the smartest thing I ever did. When the Odd in life sets in, there is my marriage to hold me still. Finances can go to crap. The kids can get colicky. Jobs can be lost. Creative pursuits may stall or never happen. Friendships will come and go. And yet, there is my marriage.  Uh, don’t get me wrong, we fight. But it’s still a pretty steady beat in an otherwise unpredictable life. We’re not great at planning. Evidence: me getting pregnant on the honeymoon. (I use the term honeymoon loosely.) So, planning out Josh’s Med School path was a pretty big deal. I’m incredibly proud of his hard work, willingness to start over, and perseverance. I’m sure there’s more hardship to come; I hear intern year is no picnic. But for now, I’m hanging on to the swing, closing my eyes in the breeze, and enjoying the satisfaction of Josh’s match day outcome. It feels so great to have tangible results!

I’m also kind of hoping that Josh will make at least one more post to his blog, which he started at the beginning of Med School. It would be a great wrap up. Some great things over there for anyone who may be interested in going to Med School, whether it’s at the University of Michigan, or not. It tracks his journey well into third year and then gets spotty, as he becomes more sleep-deprived and begins preparing for the boards and for interviews.

Congratulations to my baby on matching, and matching incredibly well. I think I just fell in love with you a little more.

I Need a Chair or a Flashlight

Josh is on this weird rotation where he works early, so he goes to bed early, and for the last week I’ve been the only one up past 9:30. What’s weird is that I haven’t wanted to write–normally a signal all is not well. But it’s okay. I’ve been preoccupied. Not unmotivated.

Be proud of me, my friends: my treadmill time is slowly becoming less of a dreadful thing. (New motto: More Tread Less Dread.) (That replaces the old motto: Cope Don’t Mope.) (My people have this thing about family mottos. I grew up on: Work Hard and Be Loyal.) Anyway, I still argue with myself daily, my will to put on my running shoes waging war on my desire for that morning cup of joe and nice game or 20 of Bejeweled instead. It’s ugly. But discipline is winning. So, my energy is coming back to me, becoming more steady. Yay. But my desire to write in the last week has diminished. Like I said, it’s okay.

This is a big week. I’ll have 12-year-old, this Wednesday. (I’m old.) Josh matches on Thursday. (FINALLY!) We received an offer on our house. (What!?!) Nothing is completely official, but my head is full of hope. And so these nights I’ve had alone, instead of writing, I’ve wanted to lose myself in reading. But, I realized last night, after the kids made a blanket fort stretching from the treadmill to the couch and beyond, that we have a serious lack of soft chairs in our house! Exact count: 0. We have a couch. I ended up in my office chair. Weird. I was actually going to read in the blanket fort, but then I realized we don’t own a flashlight either. (Note to Josh’s family:  possible Christmas drawing theme: Light. Or, Flash? Wait, not flash. No flashing!) Anyway, I’m looking forward to the newness ahead, wherever it may be. This may be my last post before Thursday (maybe an Eleanor story on her birthday), but as I linger in these last few days of not knowing, I am happy to sit in the quiet and think about a chair, a nice cozy chair in a more peaceful and secure life. It’s coming eventually.

And while I’m talking about reading, if you are a reader, YA writer, or blogger, you may want to participate in Author Appreciation Week, an idea by debut author, Heidi Kling. Have an author you love? One who has inspired you to read more, live differently, become a writer, or simply given you a few hours of much needed escape? Take a few moments and tell the world, or leave a comment here if you’d like. You can see what writers influenced me over on the About Jody Sparks page. Sara from Novel Novice has more about the week, including this awesome thumbnail you can use to mark your participation.

Self-Deprecating Sunday (18)

In which the YA Author showcases The Great and Awkward of being a teenager.

This Sunday I give geometry class 1990. Proof, if you will, that I should’ve paid more attention to how I dressed. For instance, not wearing my grandfather’s shorts. (Hey, they’re geometrical.) Yes, I really did steal my granddad’s shorts. That is a true story. I also borrowed my dad’s butter-yellow button down shirt and rolled the sleeves of it over a navy blue sweatshirt (I’d bet there’s a Jesus graphic of some kind on it, too: “true love waits” or some such). Of course, this outfit couldn’t be completed without the blue glasses, and the mod all-black Chuck Taylors. I wonder how many times the skaters looked at me and muttered, “Poser.” And perhaps the oddest thing of all is that my hair is verging on normal.

What can we take away from this? My good taste in people. At least I had the sense to hang with Cheyanne who did the era proud: Her perm is exactly right (foreshadowing her growing up to become a fancy L.A. hair designer), her friendship bracelets are stacked like a totem of coolness, and her jeans are pegged to perfection. A solid black tee announcing her apathy for things like math and plaid, in a cool way, of course.

I’ll be having more guest posts in the coming weeks! And remember, if you’re a YA author and would like to do a guest post here on Self-Deprecating Sunday, please contact me jody.mugele(at)gmail.com. It’s more fun than Church.